lillian the brave

When Miss Lil was on her way to the ER Tuesday afternoon with a bandaid over her bloody chin- a self-inflicted wound of dubious origin- she inquired of her momma, 9-months pregnant (origin not dubious), if the doctor was "going to cut her skin off ."  Her momma assured her that he would not.

Unlike her momma, who had a fit and fell in it when she got stitches in her chin as a child (see previous blog), Lil WAS a brave little soldier.  Even though her little worried, sad eyes just about broke her Nonnie's heart, she did everything that was asked of her, and only really cried- loud and hard- when the doctor poked that big ugly needle in her chin to deaden things some so he could stitch it up.  I'd have cried too, and probably come a lot closer to the screaming meemie fit her mother threw back when, if it had been me on that table.  But not Lil.  She took it, and she held so still when the doctor stitched her up that I'm sure it will be a perfect little scar for her to show off one day.  I peaked to see how it was going a time or two, but I just couldn't watch.  It just about did me in to see her little legs sticking out past where her momma sat on the table beside her, with her sweet, pink tennis-shoed feet jiggling ever so slightly from nervousness.  Don't you just hate it when a child suffers pain?  Don't you just hate it when that child is your own heart's delight?  I know I do.

But she took it, and the doctor said he'd never seen a child her age do so well.  Top 1% he said, like we didn't already know just how special and brave she was. Which made it all the sadder to see those fat, heavy teardrops form in the corners of her eyes and run down her biscuit cheeks when he inadvertently confirmed what she already feared might be true. If you don't think it matters how you phrase things to a literal-minded child, put yourself in this 3 year-old's place for a moment as the doctor, who was holding between his fingers what we adults could see were the long, leftover ends of the sutures from the last of 8 stitches, leaned over to look in her face and say "Now I'll just cut it off and then we'll be done."